Don't know what but it's killing me
Without you here to hold me
it doesn't feel like love
I don't know if it's real
or a kind of sickness
But I do know that
when
you're not around
My whole body feels like
it's going to fall down
and my heart feels like
it
has been poisoned by something
Don't know what but it's killing me
____ AKSHR
The Last Farewell
Music I heard with you was
more than music
and bread I broke with you
was more than bread.
Without you, it’s all empty
action.
The stars go on in their
courses,
but I am lost.
I don’t know where to start
in living again.
You are like the setting
sun-my eyes follow you
until they are too tired to
see.
If only love could be what we wanted it to be!
If only life could give back what it promised at its
beginning...
But I have given up expecting anything from life except this:
that it will go on and that I will go
on.
_____ AKSHR
There is no anesthesia for what you do
There is no anesthesia for
what you do:
you hold me open with your hands,
in front of yourself,
and I am the one who
screams.
There is no anesthesia for
how you do it:
you are the one who asks,
“Are you ready? Are you
ready?”
as if asking me to read the
script.
There is no anesthesia for
what I do:
Blind Light
And the sunlight clasps the earth,
And the moonbeams kiss the sea –
What are all these kissings worth
if
thou kiss not me?
If equal affection cannot be,
let the more loving be me
If equal affection cannot be,
let the more loving be me
When the one who loves most is an A,
then let the more loving be me
When the one who loves most is a B,
then let the more loving be me
Without equal affection let love be
enough for all and for each.
Without equal affection let love be
enough for all and for each.
____ AKSHR
The Errant Knight
Drink to me only with thine eyes,
And I will pledge with mine;
Or leave a kiss but in the cup,
And I'll not look for
wine.
Without that wine,those kisses are
As sanctified as pure water to a saint.
O, if it be thy will Thy will to live and love,
And I to be always blest!
Thy will be done!
I do not ask for wealth or fame;
So long as thou art true and dear,
Nor wish for aught but thee.
_____ AKSHR
Love, all alike, no season knows nor clime,
nor hours, days, months, which are the rags of time
The house of a thousand lanterns
is the heart, and love is the light.
Without love the heart is a
crematorium.
Love makes the whole world kin.
I saw you in your sleep, my beloved,
lying beside me, smiling;
I could not tell if you were awake or dreaming.
A Diamond is a Crystal
Beauty and Love are as body and soul.
Beauty is the mine, Love is the diamond
From the light of the sun, a diamond is cut;
from your eyes, what do I see? —
Beauty is the mine,
Love is the diamond
that needs a proper ending.
The Rivers Dark and Deep
Come live with me, and be my love,
and
we will some new pleasures prove
that are sweeter far than those we now
enjoy.
And I will make thee beds of roses,
and
a thousand fragrant posies.
A cap of flowers, and a kirtle,
embroidered all with leaves of myrtle;
A gown made of the finest wool which
from our pretty lambs we pull;
Time Is Distinctly an Improviser
Thinking of ways,
Don't know where to begin.
Deeply confused,
Don't know what to do,
Don't know where to go,
Don't know what to say.
Without a plan,
A broken carousel.
A voice inside says: Go with the flow.
All is lost, all is gained, everything
begins anew.
Without a plan,
The season turns late and you wonder
where it went.
You remember when time was
distinctively an improviser—
when it wasn’t your enemy.
It was making plans for you like a good
parent would do;
helping you find your way through the
fog of uncertainty;
it was free-spirited and it made sure
that things turned out fine.
It didn’t count down the days from one
hundred like a prison sentence.
Don't know how to start or how to
finish or how to get out of this mess.
Don't know where to go,
Don't know what to say.
Don't know how to start or how to
finish or how to get out of this mess.
Don't know when you'll see the end in
sight.
It doesn’t seem so far away, and yet
it's still too near.
The time is distinctly an improviser— all is lost, all is gained,
everything begins anew.
____ AKSHR
Room to Grow
And in the heart's garden,
we find the room to be ourselfs,
to grow and bloom.
This isn't a game.
I'm not trying to be cute.
Without a doubt, I know that I am
the most important human being
on the
face of this earth.
Without fear,
I speak my mind and soul
into reality.
Because I have the courage to do so,
because of my strength to be genuine,
I will get what's coming to me --
all
the good things in life.
I don't care if it takes another lifetime;
I will find my peace with myself first.
So that when others look at me and smile,
it's because they're happy for me.
So that when I look in the mirror,
I
see myself.
I am dignified, free, and beautiful.
I am enough.
_____ AKSHR
A Love Sentence
I love you as certain dark things are
to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the
soul.
Without breath, without truth,
like silence, like night
I love you as certain dark things are
to be loved,
indeed, between the shadow and the
soul.
Without joy, without peace,
like hunger, like want
I love you as certain dark things are
to be loved,
indeed between the shadow and the soul.
Without honorifics or prayers,
without thinking even of tomorrow—or
yesterday.
I love you as certain dark things are
to be loved,
indeed, between the shadow and the
soul.
Without words, without knowing,
without speech or language,
I love you as certain dark things are
to be loved,
indeed between the shadow and the soul.
Without sight, without hearing
—yet with
these senses I love you.
I love you as certain dark things are
to be loved,
indeed between the shadow and the soul.
____ AKSHR
Of Clouds a Hundred Miles High,
Sky
Looking to the sea, it is a
line
of unbroken mountains
I do not know of what.
Without words,
with shapes of clouds as
they drift and change,
their shadows on the
surface of the sea,
a sky a hundred miles high.
Without words but with a
sky and sea,
a line of clouds a hundred
miles high,
and in their changing the
lines between them changes too.
Without words that is how I
want my life to be:
with shapes in constant
change,
looking for something – I
do not know what –
not knowing where it is to be found;
without
words but with something to say.
_____ AKSHR
Be Not Afraid
Black waters, deep and dark and still .
. .
all men have passed this way, or will.
You have been told the story.
I have been called upon to tell it
again.
You are on a journey from which
you
will not return.
Be not afraid.
Your hands were made to hold;
to steady and to heal.
To mend what is torn and broken.
To caress the brow of your beloved
dying sweetly in your arms,
and cradle them into their final rest.
No matter how hard, or far,
or long the path may be:
Be not afraid.
____ AKSHR